I'm looking out on the horizon, deep in thought about people. I remember he cheated all time, and I do mean allllll the time. I was young and even though I couldn't say with any glimmer of sense what I thought love meant, I just knew it inside, and it wasn't this.
We are so unwilling as a society to sacrifice what that word means. We are too selfish. Rather than communicate we give up.
Women will share what should be the most intimate moments like sex with a man but then turn around and try to hide all of our self imagined flaws from the other person. Sucking in our tummies, putting on make-up allll the time, hiding every scar, or piece of our body that has cellulite. As if he hasn't noticed it already. I don't think men cheat because we have cellulite, or a crooked big toe for that matter. I think they cheat because rather than work into the person they are with, they give up and take the easy way out...In our drive-thru culture, they want it now without the work it requires, and I do mean work. Same thing goes for women. Communication is hard. You face rejection, scrutiny, judgement...woooooo that's all scary stuff. Why don't couples communicate better? The age old question right? And I don't mean that four letter sinful word 'talk' you men. I mean communicate! Touch, smile, kiss, laugh, spend minutes together...I mean it's not all about words right? I'm convinced that if we were just better at putting ourselves out there with our needs, our desires, our worries, and our insecurities, our relationships would last longer, that is 'if' and only 'if' the other person was able to join you in the same way instead of running screaming, 'She's/He's psycho!'
We hide...we've all been taught to hide...be mysterious, don't show others that side, always be politically correct because we are in this 'earn it' society.
I think love in its true meaning is what you give. It's an action not a feeling. Patience, understanding, kindness, willingness to go the distance even if the other person is off their rocker~out of their boots~noodly~cuckoo! Did I say cuckoo?! Oops sorry...back to the subject at hand. Love is about finding the beauty in what our society would say is ugly...the comedy in what our society would call stupid or frivolous. I mean a long lasting, long term relationship will only happen if you are willing to jump in with both feet~stinky ones, crooked toe ones, missing toe ones, extra toe ones...be totally you and allow the other person access to your heart and soul, and be willing to hold theirs.
But....we don't....we are scared...afraid and determined to never ever ever ever suffer loss again. Plus you have to actually know you, yourself, and of course be bare bones honest with yourself before you can actually be true to somebody else. Hmm...that's a whole other subject right there!
All I know is if we were all willing to decide that, instead of focusing on our needs and desires, we focus on theirs not because we are expecting something back but because we just love that person and have a secret connection with their spirit...from their smile, their laugh, the quirky faces they make, to how they fart at night in their sleep,<and you don't tell them why the fan is on in the morning>, the way they chew, their needy voice when they are sick, the way they snore, their scent...we might actually have a shot at a rare and exquisite happiness..
Eh... but what do I know...I'm probably wrong...it might just all be about SEX....Right??
No comments:
Post a Comment